It would be easy to go on about the challenges of the children, but I think some reflection is in order. The past couple years has brought a sizable shift in how Ann and I spend our time relative to the kids. That's mostly driven by Ann starting her own business, which has meant working from home and not surprisingly, working fewer hours as she builds. That's allowed her to spend more time with the kids, and while that's not by accident, it's in some ways a 180 degree shift from what was the prior norm.
That prior norm lasted several years and got to be a habit. And as most habits go, they become comforting and tough to break. While Ann seems much happier in the role she's playing, admittedly, two years later, I'm still trying to adjust. But while that's an interesting post on its own, it's the other shift that I've been thinking about: the almost complete disappearance of business travel.
For the most part, Ann or I traveling was never a burden. But, sitting here on Thursday, just about four nights in, I've been struck by the complete difference in what's involved with being home alone with the kids for a few days. It's been a while, I guess. I'm sure there's been more, but I can only think of a couple instances, and each were only a couple days.
Obviously, it's a continuum. As kids age, they become less dependent on mom and dad, or at least dependent in different ways. While I don't have to scrub them in the bath, they now scrub us for money and rides. Intellectually, that's not surprising. But, but, but... it still kind of is. Thinking about the days of yore, the days St Louis every couple weeks with Detroit sprinkled in, I can remember being "done" after three days alone. It just got mentally tiring. And I think Ann often felt the same way. But, here I am, four days in, and it's kind of business as usual. Yes, both kids seem to be reeling from not having a school day's worth of activities or having their friends around, and there's aggravation relative to that. But now? You come home, make dinner, eat, hang out, and send 'em to bed. All with very little drama or extra effort.
Now, I can't go any further without giving Cailin her props. The boy is not the easiest to babysit, especially all day long on a rainy day. And he let that be known today, even throwing a tantrum with mom on the other end of a Facetime call... yeah, nice work dude...now she won't want to call anymore. But, from what I can tell, Cailin mostly held her cool and dealt with it. She would have rather not had to of course, but she did her job and there's kudos to that.
So, while maybe every once in a while, I miss the younger version of the kids, this week is not one of them. They'll do chores, they take of themselves, bed time is easy and we can have a conversation over dinner. And after all that, I can relax, have a beer and not feel drained. Now, I do recognize that if continue with this laissez-faire approach, it will come back and bite me. They are kids after all and do need, and quite rightly deserve, some diversions from the boredom of hanging out in the house all day. I remember what it was like. There were only so many re-runs of the Dukes of Hazard, the Fall Guy or the Price is Right that I could watch every morning. I'll have to get to work on that and figure out some weekend activities. Each of their closest friends are out of town this weekend, so it looks like I can't simply send 'em away and will instead have to try. Ah, where's a good pool when you need one? Dad and his stupid racing weekends! Doesn't he appreciate his new role as our weekend getaway now that Nana and Papa's pool isn't an option? So selfish.
Well, I'll sleep on it and I'm sure stumble into something suitably fun.
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